last day

Today was an extremely sad day. It was Jen's and my last day working at Tanya Towers. We made our usual Friday Morning trip to Dunkin Donuts (which we could tell was getting to be a bit too much since we could walk in and they would know our order right away). Susan was so sweet wishing us both good luck and saying that she would be sad to see us go. When Bev left she said she was sorry to see us leave. And when we had to say goodbye to Nelly and the girls I almost couldn't handle it. After we were finished with everything Suany took Jen and I to lunch at this great Chines place around the corner. It was hard to leave everyone after such a long time working with all of them. So goodbye to my golden girls. I have to write about what I learned in order to recieve credit for this internship so today I leave you with that.

What I Learned at Tanya Towers

In our lives we are only ever exposed to that which we choose to be. We can choose to live our lives in sheltered exclusion, examining our surroundings with a close-minded mentality. We can choose to ignore our innate sense of curiosity that comes with being human. Or we can choose to step out of the shadow of complacency into a world where curiosity is the only means of education. We can choose to open both our minds and our hearts to the endless capacity of unique experiences that the world has to offer each and every one of us.

During my time working at Tanya Towers I learned that more than anything else in this rigid, pessimistic society in which I have been raised that I have to trust myself. When I first started this internship I was anxious that I would find myself in situations that I would not know how to handle or that my skills in American Sign Language would somehow be inadequate for the position. But I learned that, as hard as it is for me to accept, I, like everybody else, am allowed to make mistakes. That is of course, on the condition that I learn from them. I cannot say how many times I signed the wrong word or had to fingerspell word because I didn’t know the sign for it or misunderstood someone else’s signs. But I asked questions when I did not understand I gracefully accepted corrections from others when I was wrong. As a result, I have not only become a better signer, but a better person as well.

One of the most important lessons that I have learned over the past four months is patience. I have never by any means of the word been a patient person. My time living in this fast paced jungle of chaos and activity for the last two years has only made that fact much more abundantly clear. But this internship has helped me realize that just how vital patience is, not only for me to have it with others, but with myself. I am, as most other people are, my harshest critic. But these past four months have taught me how to let go of my frustration and enjoy every situation.

Had I not chosen to take sign language to fill my shared curriculum requirements and had I not chosen to take this internship, then I never would have opened myself to an entirely different world filled with amazing people. I never would have met this group of wonderful and accepting people that opened their arms and took me into their lives without question. I have learned that no amount of security and safety and comfort can be traded for the fulfillment and joy of broadening your horizons and taking that step forwards from who you are to who you want to be.

uh oh, spaghettio

I have no idea what happened today, but I woke up and it was 11:53. I don't know if my alarm just didn't go off or if it went off and I turned it off and went back to sleep and just don't remember it, but at any rate, I slept in and didn't make it to tanya towers.

damn drivers

Today was a crazy day. It was turkey leg day which is always a frenzy in and of itself. On top of that, Blake did not show up today and Susie and Suany both had to go to the hospital with someone so I was all by myself. Luckily Chandra was there and she was able to help hand out the food. Speaking of the food, normally it arrives around 11:30, usually 11:45 at the absolute latest. Not today however. The company that delivers the food hired a new driver and apparently he got lost on his way to Tanya Towers. The food did not arrive until 12:35!!! It was absolute madness. Fortunately, the residents were patient with me and understanding that it was not my fault. Furthermore, when the driver finally did arrive, he said to me, "Well, at least they can't yell and scream" and then proceeded to chuckle. I, however, just glared and him and proceeded to unwrap the food without uttering a word to him in return. I just coldn't believe that he had the nerve to insult these people after he was an hour late. Ignorant people just amaze me sometimes.
While we were waiting for the food to arrive, Nelly suggested calling the place. Hilda freaked out and started yelling at her that we couldn't call because he was driving and obviously he can't answer the phone if he's out driving and how could she possibly suggest such an idea. After she went on and on, Blanche then began yelling at Hilda for yelling at Nelly. It was a mess.
When Guillermina came down, her aide, who's name I finally learned today was Sonya, asked me if I would explain to Guillermina that she was just running down to the store and that she would be right back. This woman frustrates me soooo incredibley much. How can she be in the position of taking care of a deaf blind woman and not know sign language? And on top of that, she just seems ignorant of the language it's culture and all that comes with it. Everytime she opens her mouth I just want to kick her in the face. It's horrible.

Today I felt overwhelmed, frustrated and angry.

no tanya towers

I had today off because the food delivery service was closed for passover. Instead, I popped in on Deanna level 1 class to say hello and pick up her copy of Train Go Sorry. While there, I also talked about and idea that Jen, Ashley and myself have been discussing. We want to start and ASL club here at Marymount. The idea is still in it's rough, developmental stage, but basically it's focus would be community service. Ashley would like to start a babysitting program with which we could provide services to hearing parents with deaf children or deaf parents with hearing children or deaf parents with deaf children. Jen and I have grown the love the people at Tanya Towers so much that we're both having a bit of trouble letting go of them. We just can't imagine them not being a part of our lives anymore. So we want to spruce up their space for them a little bit. It's such a great space and there's so much that we could do with it if we only had the time and resources, which this club could provide. We have so many ideas like painting a mural on an outside wall or starting a garden or fixing up benches. We're hoping to get it approved before the end of the semester so that we can start things right away when we return in the fall.

operation mosaic commences

Jen's friend Mackenzi joined us at good ol' Tanya Towers today. We had baked fish today and we all know what that means...busy, busy busy! We ran completely out of food today but luckily no one else came down so we didn't have to turn anyone away. I would feel so bad if we ever had to to that. Hilda wanted Jen to help her call her son in Germany after lunch was finished today, so the three of us went up to her apartment after we had finished cleaning up to see what we could do. It was so interesting though. I called her son at work and then I would give the phone to Hilda and she would speak to him in German and then she would give the phone back to me and he would reply to me in English and then I would sign to her what he was saying to me. It was just such a unique situation.
Jen finally got to meet Cliff today and she agrees with me that he is quite adorable. He started his project today so I stuck around to help out. He showed me everything that he has so far in terms of tiles and whatnot. He has all this amazing pottery that he got for free from a friend in Philly and it's beautiful. Some of it is broken but some of it is still whole. We went outside and started mapping out where we wanted the mosaic to be. So the residents came down around 2:30 and we started our planning meeting. They wanted Cliff to sign and speak at the same time. Whew! That was craziness. We were discussing different ideas of what they wanted to do for the mosaic and it was so funny because they all started naming the most random things to have in it; "a mouse, an elephant, fish, cats, birds." I guess these people just love their animals or something. So finally we came up 3 different themes for it and voted. Luckily the idea that Cliff and I were pulling for was picked so it looks we're going to be doing a "fun city." Kind of hard to explain, but trust me, it's going to be cool. So it looks like we're going to be working on it on Fridays. Should be interesting trying to work with everyone all at the same time. Hopefully next weel I'm going to try and take some pictures so everyone will finally be able to put faces to all these names I keep talking about.

Today I felt comfortable, excited and inspired.

by myself...kinda

Well Blake worked with me today, as he normally does on Wednesdays. But I pretty much did everything anyway. He didn't get there until about 11:40 and by that time I already had everything set up. Then after lunch was finished he sat down and was talking to Bessie and William and wasn't much help cleaning up. But whatever, I don't reallt mind.
Today we had meatballs and linguini. I sampled a few of the meatballs and they weren't that bad.
Nelly was back today. Jen and I might be teaching her on Fridays how to use computers so she can be all caught up for the class that she's in.
Cliff stopped in, wasn't expecting that. He was talking to Lea so I went over and was talking with them. I asked him when he was starting his project. So we started signing and Lea told him that he could speak to me because I'm hearing. He laughed and said "I know, it's just good practice." Lea cracks me up sometimes with the things she feels the need to inform everyone of. But he's decided to do a mosaic on one of the walls out on the terrace. It should be pretty cool. I asked him if he needed any help and he said that he would love some. So I think Jen and I are going to be helping him with his project. Should be fun. And remember that crush I mentioned I thought I might have? Yeah. Enough said.

Today I felt annoyed, inqusitive and flirtatious.